Mental Illness
When I was at the church tonight with the Deacons, I had a thought about a particular woman that was in the ward house. The Deacons are no angels, and I would never say that they were, but in this case I think they called yelled at for no good reason. Of course, we were there for Young Men. One of the boys found a little car that should've been in the nursery but wasn't. He was running around the halls with it (which he was in the wrong to be doing). A lady in the Daybreak ward that meets in our building came out of the kitchen and started yelling at all the deacons. She was claiming that one of them had run over her three year old child, and the proof was that a three year old child would never lie. Anyway, she became quite unglued. I just went to the boys and told them to put away the car and have more respect for the church building and sharing it with all people.
Well, Lance wanted to go talk to her and see what right she had to get all up in arms over something as harmless as the boys were doing. I had been out in the hall and know that the boys did not run over this womans three year old child. I just told Lance to let it go. I'm not so sure that the lady is not mentally ill. We later had another lady come to us and tell us not to worry about this incident because this lady is like this all the time. She told us to just brush it off.
Unfortunately, I have seen some mental illness first hand in the form of my wifes sister. It is sad really, and she is living a really sad life. Over the Presidents Day Weekend when we were at my in-laws home, Melanie called home a few times. Sometimes she talked OK for a little while before she escalated and made life miserable to the person who ended up on the other end of the phone. It was mostly my mother-in-law. I felt really bad for Margaret for having to go through this on a continual basis. Melanie's' mental illness is so bad that my children have never even met her. I have never been with Melanie when she did not escalate to the point of craziness. There was even one time when the Heber City Police got called on us when we were up at the cabin and she had a major argument. It is something terrible.
Melanie's' recent complaints are quite valid. Her husband has been picked up and put into jail for his coke problem. He also has lost his job. For many years he has been able to give Melanie some money to live on. Now, it seems that this won't happen any longer. She is really worried about how to live on nothing. Margaret has told her that she is willing to see what she can do to help. The only problem is that part of that help has to be based on Melanie getting help through some of the drugs that are available to one with a mental illness. Melanie complains that we aren't there to support her, and to a point she is valid in that assessment. What she doesn't see is that we can't get around her because sooner or later she loses it and it isn't sensible to be around her at that time. She sees that we weren't there for her when she lost her kids to her brother-in-law. What she doesn't see is that we were also restrained from seeing her kids during that time as well. I don't know what to do about this kind of thing, but it is really sad to sit back and see all this crap going on.
We never go to visit Melanie, because of her illness. My wife and I tried to go see her a couple of years ago when we were in Ogden. Unfortunately she wasn't at home when we went around. My wife really misses her sister (even when her sister is around), and the camaraderie that she once shared with this long lost sister. How do you fix that kind of thing? In some ways, I think death of a loved one is easier than this. At least with death you know you can't visit with them at this time. With this, you can't visit them even though they are around because it is terrible when you do.
When Margaret talks to Melanie on the phone, she only talks while there is some semblance of sanity. That soon leaves. Things escalate. Margaret ends up putting the phone under a cushion on the couch while Melanie rambles on. She can't hang up because that will give Melanie one more thing to complain about. It has to be Melanie. You can't get a word in edgewise though when she is that way. She has to finally hangup. It can take a long time before she finally hangs up. Margaret checks the phone periodically to see if that has happened yet. Finally, it is over. Margaret is sad. She doesn't know how she can help her daughter. If her daughter isn't willing to admit that she has a mental health problem, she also isn't willing to get drugs to help her out with it. I'm afraid she has to hit rock bottom before things will get any better. Maybe, now that she doesn't have any means of living she will finally hit that point and something can be done. I have hopes, but they are not great hopes. I would love for my wife to be able to visit with her sister again and talk like close sisters do.
Well, Lance wanted to go talk to her and see what right she had to get all up in arms over something as harmless as the boys were doing. I had been out in the hall and know that the boys did not run over this womans three year old child. I just told Lance to let it go. I'm not so sure that the lady is not mentally ill. We later had another lady come to us and tell us not to worry about this incident because this lady is like this all the time. She told us to just brush it off.
Unfortunately, I have seen some mental illness first hand in the form of my wifes sister. It is sad really, and she is living a really sad life. Over the Presidents Day Weekend when we were at my in-laws home, Melanie called home a few times. Sometimes she talked OK for a little while before she escalated and made life miserable to the person who ended up on the other end of the phone. It was mostly my mother-in-law. I felt really bad for Margaret for having to go through this on a continual basis. Melanie's' mental illness is so bad that my children have never even met her. I have never been with Melanie when she did not escalate to the point of craziness. There was even one time when the Heber City Police got called on us when we were up at the cabin and she had a major argument. It is something terrible.
Melanie's' recent complaints are quite valid. Her husband has been picked up and put into jail for his coke problem. He also has lost his job. For many years he has been able to give Melanie some money to live on. Now, it seems that this won't happen any longer. She is really worried about how to live on nothing. Margaret has told her that she is willing to see what she can do to help. The only problem is that part of that help has to be based on Melanie getting help through some of the drugs that are available to one with a mental illness. Melanie complains that we aren't there to support her, and to a point she is valid in that assessment. What she doesn't see is that we can't get around her because sooner or later she loses it and it isn't sensible to be around her at that time. She sees that we weren't there for her when she lost her kids to her brother-in-law. What she doesn't see is that we were also restrained from seeing her kids during that time as well. I don't know what to do about this kind of thing, but it is really sad to sit back and see all this crap going on.
We never go to visit Melanie, because of her illness. My wife and I tried to go see her a couple of years ago when we were in Ogden. Unfortunately she wasn't at home when we went around. My wife really misses her sister (even when her sister is around), and the camaraderie that she once shared with this long lost sister. How do you fix that kind of thing? In some ways, I think death of a loved one is easier than this. At least with death you know you can't visit with them at this time. With this, you can't visit them even though they are around because it is terrible when you do.
When Margaret talks to Melanie on the phone, she only talks while there is some semblance of sanity. That soon leaves. Things escalate. Margaret ends up putting the phone under a cushion on the couch while Melanie rambles on. She can't hang up because that will give Melanie one more thing to complain about. It has to be Melanie. You can't get a word in edgewise though when she is that way. She has to finally hangup. It can take a long time before she finally hangs up. Margaret checks the phone periodically to see if that has happened yet. Finally, it is over. Margaret is sad. She doesn't know how she can help her daughter. If her daughter isn't willing to admit that she has a mental health problem, she also isn't willing to get drugs to help her out with it. I'm afraid she has to hit rock bottom before things will get any better. Maybe, now that she doesn't have any means of living she will finally hit that point and something can be done. I have hopes, but they are not great hopes. I would love for my wife to be able to visit with her sister again and talk like close sisters do.
posted by Craig's Blog at 10:44 PM
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