My Wife's Tears
Last Friday during the night, our dog moaned out in some pain. Her name is Kisha. She is a Cocker Spaniel, and is around fifteen years old. She has had tumors showing up on her body, she seems to be mostly blind, and she is somewhat deaf. About a month ago, there was some blood that was coming out of her mouth. It was an abscess, that my wife was able to get the vet to cut out. It was questioned at that time whether or not we should put her to sleep (that's just a nice word for killing her). We decided against it at the time, but now, she seems to just be in pain.
On Saturday, I told my wife she should call the vet. She didn't really want too and was sure he wasn't in anyway. She finally decided to do it, and called at 3:45. He had closed at 3:00. Now, it was looking like we would have to wait until Sunday. It was also suggested that we could try the Humane Society. We let it go.
Sunday came and went. Kisha layed around the house like she always does. She is an old dog after all. She goes from vent to vent in the house making sure she can get the coolest location in the house. My wife went home from Sacrament meeting to make sure that she was OK. She did come back, but it is that concerning to us. Our son took Kisha out for a walk on Sunday evening. She hadn't pooped all day, but finally some came out during the walk.
Then comes today. I had to go into work and my wife was going to call the vet. It is a different vet than the one we went too when we had the abscess taken off of in her mouth. She is told that the doctor would like to see her first and look into some options. We have already come to the conclusion that it is not fair to be keeping her alive. She tried to explain this, but got no sympathy from the vets assistant, although she thought the assistant was nice. They do all of their euthanasia in the evening when work is done, and by the time we got the vets bill it would be around $200, and we would probably have to go back in tomorrow evening. The appointment today was already pushing our limit since we had a family get together tonight. My wife called me not knowing what to do, and she was choking back some tears it seemed. I told her I would try to call the Humane Society.
I looked up the Humane Society's website, and found their time of operation. It was after the time that they got there, so I tried to call them. The phone rang off the hook. This happened for a good 45 minutes. I called my wife and told her that I would drop around to their address and make sure they could receive the dog and call her from there. They were indeed open and I called my wife. Yes, they could take our dog in. Soon after we checked her in they would give her the "blue juice" and then she would die peacefully and pain free. My wife was in tears as I said this to her.
I headed home and found my wife cleaning. She had already taken some of the blankets of Kisha and started the wash. There was still her small home (it is a simple tent like thing that we have for her) and Kisha was in it. My wife met me in the garage. She was anxious. She was surprised that I was home so quick. The tears were in her eyes. Such a sad look.
I went in and got the leash of our dog. She didn't come out of her house immediately. I did finally get her out of there and she was ready for a walk. You could see some youth coming to her as I attached the leash. I hugged my wife, told her I was sorry for her loss and then took Kisha to the car. She didn't jump right in as I expected. I had to pick her up and put her in on the passenger side on the floor. It was kind of sad and pathetic. She just lay there.
I usually enjoy driving a car. This was an exception to the rule. The dog is my wife's dog. I don't care one way or the other, but I certainly do not hate animals. I also don't like to be the one who is killing them. I have a few mixed emotions on this. We don't do this to humans, although in some cases I really believe that we should. I wonder about what is right and what is wrong. Of course, I think that Kisha is not living a good quality of life, and I have to believe that for what I am about to do.
We get to the Humane Society. I go around to let the dog out. She doesn't hop right out. I have to coax her out. We start our walk. There is a curb, and she doesn't quite see it. Her face kind of bumps into it (not hard). I feel terrible. As I walk up the sidewalk, Kisha is sniffing around and is behind me (she usually likes to walk in front). She is trying to turn and go the other way. I have to drag her in. She has very little fight, but puts in a little bit to try to get me to turn around.
Inside, I am told that since no other dogs or people are around, I can release her. She wanders around a bit curious about what the surroundings are. I hand over my identification and give the girl at the computer some of my information and the dogs name. She asks how to spell it, and I tell her that we really never came up with a spelling. Is that pathetic or what? I look down at Kisha who has come up to me. She is shaking all over. I wonder if she knows what's going on. I hate this. I ask how long it will be. I am told that the paperwork had already been handed back and just as soon as they go through the door the whole process will start. It will be a very short time.
The girl at the computer comes around the desk. I take off the collar of Kisha and she pets her a little bit. She realizes that the dog is blind. She says, that's what happens to these ol' ladies. Kisha is picked up. She looks at me. She goes through the door and is gone. She is out of sight, but not out of mind. I go out to my car, and call my wife. I tell her it is done, but she really didn't want to hear it. I can hear the choking up of my wife. I absolutely hate this. It is a necessity, but I certainly do not like it. Kisha, be happy in dog heaven. You have been a good dog, and will be missed. I go back to work.
After work, I head home. My wife has been working on a salad for the barbecue tonight at my brothers house. It has been a horrible day for my wife and she is tired. She messed up on the salad where she read 8 ounces instead of three. She had to go back and pick up some more items at the grocery store and makes a double batch. She has a migrane. She won't be going to the barbecue.
We get the kids packed into the car, and go to my brothers house. While in transit, my wife calls. I get a call on the call waiting, but ignore it. After I am done talking with my wife, I look at the number and don't recognize it. A message was left. It was for our son for a job interview at Chic-fil-a. I have him call back and set up an appointment for tomorrow at 4:30.
We have the barbecue and then there is swimming in the pool. We do a volleyball game in there and that is quite enjoyable. We allow for four hits per side and almost not carries. Then a one second rule is applied if the ball is in the water under that for one time. This just adds to the fun.
Around 9:30 I change back to my regular clothes. Another call comes in from Chic-fil-a. I need to get the phone to my son, but have to put on some clothes first. His appointment got changed. It is still tomorrow though.
We do some limbo, and I do better than I thought I could. We help clean up and then go home. My wife calls us because she is worried about how late we are. We had a great time, people missed my wife, and the dish she made was excellent. I am glad to get back home to her. I love her, and hate for her to have the lonliness of missing her dog. I don't know what to do, so I do nothing.
On Saturday, I told my wife she should call the vet. She didn't really want too and was sure he wasn't in anyway. She finally decided to do it, and called at 3:45. He had closed at 3:00. Now, it was looking like we would have to wait until Sunday. It was also suggested that we could try the Humane Society. We let it go.
Sunday came and went. Kisha layed around the house like she always does. She is an old dog after all. She goes from vent to vent in the house making sure she can get the coolest location in the house. My wife went home from Sacrament meeting to make sure that she was OK. She did come back, but it is that concerning to us. Our son took Kisha out for a walk on Sunday evening. She hadn't pooped all day, but finally some came out during the walk.
Then comes today. I had to go into work and my wife was going to call the vet. It is a different vet than the one we went too when we had the abscess taken off of in her mouth. She is told that the doctor would like to see her first and look into some options. We have already come to the conclusion that it is not fair to be keeping her alive. She tried to explain this, but got no sympathy from the vets assistant, although she thought the assistant was nice. They do all of their euthanasia in the evening when work is done, and by the time we got the vets bill it would be around $200, and we would probably have to go back in tomorrow evening. The appointment today was already pushing our limit since we had a family get together tonight. My wife called me not knowing what to do, and she was choking back some tears it seemed. I told her I would try to call the Humane Society.
I looked up the Humane Society's website, and found their time of operation. It was after the time that they got there, so I tried to call them. The phone rang off the hook. This happened for a good 45 minutes. I called my wife and told her that I would drop around to their address and make sure they could receive the dog and call her from there. They were indeed open and I called my wife. Yes, they could take our dog in. Soon after we checked her in they would give her the "blue juice" and then she would die peacefully and pain free. My wife was in tears as I said this to her.
I headed home and found my wife cleaning. She had already taken some of the blankets of Kisha and started the wash. There was still her small home (it is a simple tent like thing that we have for her) and Kisha was in it. My wife met me in the garage. She was anxious. She was surprised that I was home so quick. The tears were in her eyes. Such a sad look.
I went in and got the leash of our dog. She didn't come out of her house immediately. I did finally get her out of there and she was ready for a walk. You could see some youth coming to her as I attached the leash. I hugged my wife, told her I was sorry for her loss and then took Kisha to the car. She didn't jump right in as I expected. I had to pick her up and put her in on the passenger side on the floor. It was kind of sad and pathetic. She just lay there.
I usually enjoy driving a car. This was an exception to the rule. The dog is my wife's dog. I don't care one way or the other, but I certainly do not hate animals. I also don't like to be the one who is killing them. I have a few mixed emotions on this. We don't do this to humans, although in some cases I really believe that we should. I wonder about what is right and what is wrong. Of course, I think that Kisha is not living a good quality of life, and I have to believe that for what I am about to do.
We get to the Humane Society. I go around to let the dog out. She doesn't hop right out. I have to coax her out. We start our walk. There is a curb, and she doesn't quite see it. Her face kind of bumps into it (not hard). I feel terrible. As I walk up the sidewalk, Kisha is sniffing around and is behind me (she usually likes to walk in front). She is trying to turn and go the other way. I have to drag her in. She has very little fight, but puts in a little bit to try to get me to turn around.
Inside, I am told that since no other dogs or people are around, I can release her. She wanders around a bit curious about what the surroundings are. I hand over my identification and give the girl at the computer some of my information and the dogs name. She asks how to spell it, and I tell her that we really never came up with a spelling. Is that pathetic or what? I look down at Kisha who has come up to me. She is shaking all over. I wonder if she knows what's going on. I hate this. I ask how long it will be. I am told that the paperwork had already been handed back and just as soon as they go through the door the whole process will start. It will be a very short time.
The girl at the computer comes around the desk. I take off the collar of Kisha and she pets her a little bit. She realizes that the dog is blind. She says, that's what happens to these ol' ladies. Kisha is picked up. She looks at me. She goes through the door and is gone. She is out of sight, but not out of mind. I go out to my car, and call my wife. I tell her it is done, but she really didn't want to hear it. I can hear the choking up of my wife. I absolutely hate this. It is a necessity, but I certainly do not like it. Kisha, be happy in dog heaven. You have been a good dog, and will be missed. I go back to work.
After work, I head home. My wife has been working on a salad for the barbecue tonight at my brothers house. It has been a horrible day for my wife and she is tired. She messed up on the salad where she read 8 ounces instead of three. She had to go back and pick up some more items at the grocery store and makes a double batch. She has a migrane. She won't be going to the barbecue.
We get the kids packed into the car, and go to my brothers house. While in transit, my wife calls. I get a call on the call waiting, but ignore it. After I am done talking with my wife, I look at the number and don't recognize it. A message was left. It was for our son for a job interview at Chic-fil-a. I have him call back and set up an appointment for tomorrow at 4:30.
We have the barbecue and then there is swimming in the pool. We do a volleyball game in there and that is quite enjoyable. We allow for four hits per side and almost not carries. Then a one second rule is applied if the ball is in the water under that for one time. This just adds to the fun.
Around 9:30 I change back to my regular clothes. Another call comes in from Chic-fil-a. I need to get the phone to my son, but have to put on some clothes first. His appointment got changed. It is still tomorrow though.
We do some limbo, and I do better than I thought I could. We help clean up and then go home. My wife calls us because she is worried about how late we are. We had a great time, people missed my wife, and the dish she made was excellent. I am glad to get back home to her. I love her, and hate for her to have the lonliness of missing her dog. I don't know what to do, so I do nothing.
posted by Craig's Blog at 11:50 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home